Chuffy's Flying Circus

Excitement abounds as the nuptial news of Wee Willy and Katie spreads to the four corners of the British Empire.    So, despite his previous flops [“Bluey’s Kaption Korner” and “For Movie Buffs]), brave,  brave Bluey, that noted Royals Watcher, has elected to start up a new thread: Bluey’s Royal FacePage.    Who else (or is it “whom else”?) else, you might ask, for surely the BlueDog must have distant royal blood coursing through his cholesterol choked veins â€" true British blue blood too; and not that dodgy Dutch stuff!

So, Chaps, here is the place to air anything related to the Royals.   As usual, I’ll start the ball rolling with a royal anecdote:

Snow White, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo were chatting amiably one day when Sow White said: “You know, I’m regarded as the most beautiful woman in the world”.

Tom Thumb, not to be outdone said “Well, It’s considered that, at a mere 6 cm, I am regarded as the smallest one of all”.

“That’s nothing,” Quasimodo butted in “I’m the ugliest person in the world”

“It’s all very well us saying this,” said the ever wise Thumb “but how can we prove it?”

Miss White thought for a while and then had a brilliant idea “I know, let’s check with the people at the Guinness Book of Records â€" surely they will know!”

So, arrangements were made for the three to appear individually before a GBR panel to qualify their claims.   Snow White went in first, and came out about 15 minutes later. “It’s official, I’m the most beautiful woman on Earth” she said smugly.

Tom Thumb went in next, coming out again about 10 minutes later with a broad grin upon his tiny visage.   â€œYay” he cried “at a mere 6 cm I’m definitely the smallest by a very large margin”

Quasimodo then fronted the panel but came out again in less than a minute, scratching his head in confusion.   He threw himself on the ground in front of White and Thumb, obviously in much distress; and through great sobs he wailed “Just who the hell is Camilla Parker Bowles?”   

Come on Camilla....let's show the pack who you are!

(http://i303.photobucket.com/albums/nn134/Nicholaiovitch/Misc/Camilla_horse.jpg)

Bounder ;D

I caught this little by play on my last visit to Buckingham Palace...

(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v30/woof603/Image.jpg)

"IT WASN'T ME!"

Does this chap count as Royalty?

http://www.stevebridges.com/obamavideos-promo-jan2010-lg.html (http://www.stevebridges.com/obamavideos-promo-jan2010-lg.html)

Bounder ;D

I don't think so.  Anyway, it's about time they got engaged.  Good luck to them, and here's hoping it doesn't turn out as... well, you know.

Betty and Phil the Greek dropped by for tea with Shaky Mo this week. The only time I heard anything mentioned was on the traffic report. Apparently they closed the Abu Dhabi corniche during rush hour this evening, for some Royal reason, and gridlocked the whole city for the start of the weekend.
Not a popular decision amongst the commuters panting for an end of work cold one.

Well, the wedding's set for April 29th next year at Westminster.  And what do you know, some idiot has already decided to run his mouth: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-11822681
I give him just a few seconds before the world tears him a new one.
And that's not the only worry:
http://thescotsman.scotsman.com/uk/Royal-wedding-at-risk-of.6637561.jp

Theres a joke in the names somewhere but I cant get anything to deliver the punchline: KatWilly!   ???


It would actually be nice to return to a monachy, you still get phucked over by the government but at least you know where you stand - in the gutter like the peasant you are...

Looks like someone got what they deserved!
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/crime/off-with-their-heads-shouted-the-crowd-as-charles-and-camilla-met-rage-in-regent-street-2157412.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/theroyalfamily/8195538/Royal-couple-put-in-danger-after-police-radio-failure.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/theroyalfamily/8193279/Amateur-footage-of-attack-on-Charles-and-Camillas-car.html
Check the third link for footage of Camilla getting jabbed!

3rd Clip reminds me of my "nights out" in appearence.

All riotus students should be shot dead on the spot!

I have a better idea for crowd control, though I wouldn't have applied it this time.
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/7e/Marineflametank1968.jpg/558px-Marineflametank1968.jpg)

One of 2 official engagement photos released!
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/6/67/Royal_engagement_official.jpg)

Looks like she's holding a cardboard cut-out!

You're right Binks! :D

Looks like Willie wants to remain a Prince: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/royal-wedding/8196402/Royal-wedding-Prince-William-asks-the-Queen-not-to-make-him-a-duke.html
Good on him.

I have to admit, it was a bit of a start when I saw the TV ads for this:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/royal-wedding/8212551/Royal-wedding-official-merchandise-goes-on-sale-for-first-time.html

Must have stuff.  8)   Help save England's potters. :P

My favourite Barmy Army chant during the Ashes was ""Your next queen is Camilla Parker Bowles, Camilla Parker Bowles, Camilla Parker Bowles", sung to the tune of Yellow Submarine. :D :D :D

Of course, she''ll be your's too! ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

My prediction: when Betty departs the fix and Chuckie takes over, Australia will become a republic immediately. ;D

My errant son has just designed a urinal, complete with Royal crest, photographs, and the initials WC, especially for the Scottish Market.
Look out for them in your nearest Glasgow pub soon.....

Better tell your son to be braced for failure.  Last time I was in a Glasgow pub I overhead one of the locals say, "Royal Family?  I would nae even p!ss on them".

Ayy....and....hic...I mite ney reach yourinal!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5yJKmaKecI (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5yJKmaKecI)

Bounder ;D

Actually, his idea is to screw them to the wall on the outside of the pub, where they might get more use  :D

Well it looks like his nibs and the new missus will be coming to Canada this summer. I hope they bring lots of mosquito repellent  :D!

So all this wedding stuff was going to completely pass me by until I saw in the Radio Times that there would be a flypast of the BoB memorial flight and that a BBC presenter would be broadcasting live from inside the Lancaster - might be worth a look-see?

Ted

Crikey, mine must be the only household in the Country where we're looking forwards to the wedding!   ???

We've even got bunting and I've been practicing my CoD flypast in a Tigermoth.....  :-[

:o :o :o

Not interested really. Last Royal of any use was the Queen Mum gord bless 'er; described by Hitler as 'the most dangerous woman in Britain'
Also she was a fan of Ska...I have a vision of her windin' me waist, with a g and t in one hand and racing form in the other.
Partaking of the Street party in our village though, (takes me back to VE day) Two events in two weeks what with this and the traditional Eastertide a'smolloking of the ganderbags is too much excitement here.

BalDaddy, would you be kind enough to explain "a'smollicking of the ganderbags"?  I love the phrase, I want to steal it, but I guess I should know what it means, if anything, before I use it.

Mucho gracias, Senor.

"Ganderbags" must have something to do with the eyes; but I'm a'smollicked if I can work out what "a'smollicking" is.

Also request clarification, please BalDaddy.

Arrrr 'tis a tradition in the area bound by this rhyme:

Upton Snodsbury,
Peopleton and Crowle,
North Piddle
Wyre Piddle, an' Piddle in the Hole!

I 'til recently lived in Cowsden which is a hamlet  near to Upton Snodsbury, and have now retired to distant lands, Naunton Beauchamp all of one and a half mile away near the Piddle Brook; the inhabitants thus described in a travelogue as being: 'smellie and of a suspicious natuyre' (ok it was written in 1750, but little has changed).

The age-old tithe to the Lord of the Manor (Three hides and 1 virgate of Urse's) has been replaced with the charming act of a'smolloking.....the children of the village dress up in their best pull-on rumpsters, gather at the Ewe & Wellington Inn and with a ganderbag full of cordwangles and boggled turmutts go round the village bounds singing:

"I’ll sing you one-oh!
   (Green grow me Bogling Fork)
   What be your one-oh?
   One is the grunge upon my splod, masking my Cordwangle!

   I’ll sing you two-oh!
   (Green grow me Bogling Fork)
   What be your two-oh?
   Two are me looming thrums, see how they jangle.
   One is the grunge upon my splod, masking my Cordwangle!

   Three are the times I’ve lunged my groats!
   Two are me looming thrums, see how they jangle.
   One is the grunge upon my splod, masking my Cordwangle!

   Four for me whirdler’s bent-oh!
   Three are the times I’ve lunged my groats!
   Two are me looming thrums, see how they jangle.
   One is the grunge upon my splod, masking my Cordwangle!

   Five’s the wonglers up my spong,
   Four for me whirdler’s bent-oh!
   Three are the times I’ve lunged my groats!
   Two are me looming thrums, see how they jangle.
   One is the grunge upon my splod, it’s ruined my Cordwangle!!!"

Hope that clarifies things for you

Hmmm,

I didn't know you were fluent in Sandskrit BalDaddy :D

BalDaddy, that's purely wonderful!  Where can I get the CD or be stiil my heart, a DVD with you performing.

Wonderful stuff. Brings back memories of that oft overlooked minstrel, Rambling Sid Rumpo!

You Poms have got a lot to answer for! :P

Ah Binks! you clenched my moolies (he's rumbled me in plain English)
see here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=013O6kAa3Yg&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=013O6kAa3Yg&feature=related)

The brilliant but troubled Kenneth Williams recorded probably about 1967.

OOooOOooOOoooooOOooohhhhhhh!

BalDaddy, you led me to this Kenneth Williams bit which I think is most appropriate for Bluey...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GWTs9SP3AIc&feature=related

Haaarrrrr!! Iv'e never seen that one; larfed so much I nearly wordelled my spong.
Thanks for posting.

So, are you Chaps going to watch the wedding on the tely?

C'mon, 'fess up, you know you want to... ;D

Pip, pip,
Conky

Woof, for once in my life I'm speechless!

And I've never woggled a jumbuck in my life.   A gringclanger, perhaps, but not a jumbuck.

QuoteSo, are you Chaps going to watch the wedding on the tely?

C'mon, 'fess up, you know you want to... Grin

Mrs Bluey will be, but I won't .............the TV broadcast clashes with the footy.   No contest.

http://www2.macleans.ca/2011/04/28/bunting-shortage-spreads-in-u-k/

This is outrageous.   How could it possibly happen?   You Brits have been running royal weddings for at least a thousand years and you still can't get the bunting right!

What's so hard about figuring our how many households in England, then estimating how much bunting would be required per household?   After all, what was the Doomsday book all about; and have the bureaurocrats not heard of a 'census'?   Tesco's 120 mile supply was clearly never going to be enough.

It's not as if Will and Kate woke up the other morning and said "let's get married Friday".   You've had months to prepare for this.   It's a national disgrace.

How on earth did you manage to put together an empire, or win the war, or (more importantly) win the ashes with such poor logistics planning?

Those kilted caber tossers from the north must be beside themselves with laughter.

Ah yes, a new BoB, the Battle of Bunting! :D

Well we got ours all right!

Plus the in laws were using red white and blue undies on the washing line to similiar effect last week!!

Pip pip,

Fitz

I was up at 0430 today to watch the Wedding.  A great show which put me in mind of this quote from an unknown to me British journo:

"Kate and Pippa are known as the Wisteria sisters because they're fragile, smell great and are wonderful climbers."

;D

 :D :D :D :D

That Pippa lassy is lurvely!!  Sigh.... Off for a cool down with a moist Financial Times....  :-[

Nobody does pageantry like the Brits, but I didn't spot the Morris dancers in the guard of honour. Could it be that their "raciness" was thought inappropriate,  or more likely, were they overcome by an overabundance of warm beer varieties.

The truth needs to be told!

Truly a wonderful event.   My team won by 16 points after a hard fought battle.   Oh, and Mrs Bluey tells me the wedding went well too.

That bunting story was an ignoble slur to our National  Integrity....I've just been to B&Q today (Sunday) and they still have plenty after the event reduced to half price....so there Jonny Foriegner!!

You guys are killing me

Birthday time.

Happy 90th today, Phil.   Hope you get a nice pair of toenail clippers to prevent those nasty cuts to the lips and tongue.

This week in OZ (except Western Australia) we celebrate the Queen's ceremonial birthday.   Happy birthday Betty.

Looking ahead:

In OZ, horses have their nominal birthday on 1 August each year.   Happy birthday Annie.    And 1 September is Quazimodo's birthday ... Happy birthday Camilla.

I gather you haven't been invited to the Palace lately, BD.  ;D